SexFit – A New Sex Toy

How many times has this happened to you: you’re having sex with a woman, and as you are pounding away several thoughts cross your mind, such as “Gee, I wonder how many calories I am burning with all this fucking.”, and “I wonder how many times I’ve thrusted my dick into her just now.”, and “Man, I wish I could have an accurate tally of both so I could share the results with all my friends and family on social media.” If this sounds like you, good news.

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This week, pretty pirate and effervescent elf Orlando Bloom lived out the dream of anyone with any sense by throwing a punch at celebrated shithead Justin Bieber. Surprisingly, the reason was not for Bieber’s crimes against humanity’s ears, but…*gasp*…because of a woman. An incredibly hot woman, as it turns out: the lovely, talented and lovely (can’t over emphasize her lovliness) Miranda Kerr.

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Charlize Theron Posing for Terry Richardson

I love Charlize Theron, but y’all know by now how I feel about Terry Richardson, so I’m not going to delve into all of that again and continue to slag on that piece of shit. But he is a piece of shit, FYI. If you want to read me ranting about what a POS he is, which I’m sure you don’t, be sure to check out a recent post I did on another one of his photo shoots with Rita Ora.

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